Read moo's blog....knew that i'm not alone in those situation...neither do she...
i hate the fact that i cant communicate with patients here in English when dispensing..and i didn't know 'penat' is actually means asthma till a malay colleague whom i partner with in my 1st A&E call taught me that.....
i hate the fact that i have to work on sunday...eventhough i stay at home, i won't be able to join my friends saturday nite outing...i'm desperate to go to the hard rock hotel in penang,for a swim or a drink.i'm desperate to have a normal monday to friday 9-5 working life...and i hate the fact that there's so little PRP in my hospital...which means on call is damn ficken frequent....and i hate the fact that i hav to do a research project...i hate more about the fact that i have to do it in a group of 3...ask me personaly if wana noe why...
With my astig, i cant drive properly at nite ..and my hospital IP department where i hav to run TDM during a nite call, is next to the forensic department at the sub-basement,where there is no signal for mobile phone as well...all my FRP colleagues said they used to bring along their 'abang' or 'someone' to run TDM with them at nite..i scared of those alive one more actually.... i have noone to accompany me for my TDM call...as i always tell ppl around me, living in this country, 'ji kei bou zong'...cos human rights merely exist here...
I'm actually glad that i will be attached in enforcement for 2 weeks follow by the attachment in health clinic for another 2 weeks...which means i can be away from my hospital for 1 month. But the fact that the FRP-to be senior might not be there already when i get back next month depressed me a lot....i hate the fact that i'm the only IMU PRP there!!!
i hate to deal with people...i hate the fact that i cant be myself for the sake of being courteous.i miss laughing loudly, talking fastly, and saying things from my heart as i used to be.... i miss the old me.
i'm not complaining...life 's not that bad actually....just that it's not good either.